Adopting Sasha - The Journey 2009

Sometimes I laugh, Sometimes I Cry

Well our first week as a new family is complete.  We have all had a good week besides one little meltdown last Sunday. Nathan has given me many reasons to laugh and cry this week and I wanted to share them with you.  I am keeping a notebook close by to journal all of this so I can share it with him when he is older. Enjoy!!

On Monday Nathan had his first tutoring session with Nadya.  Nadya is a sweet lady that has become our friend after meeting her family while Nathan was here on the hosting trip, Christmas 2008. Nadya was a high school teacher in Russia and now homeschools her own children.  Before we left to go to Nadya's on Monday, Nathan got three of his own gifts to take and give to Nadya's three children.  He put each in a gift bag with tissue paper and was so excited to give them the surprises. This blessed my heart so much, but also amazed me that a child who has lived in an orphanage his entire life with absolutely nothing would be so willing to give to others. WOW! Good lesson for all of us.

Nathan knows that Allison has a birthday soon and everyday he has asked me how many more days.  While we were at Walgreens this week he wanted to look around.  In the Easter section he found a pink pen with a fussy top on it and he said to me, "Allison's birthday?". I think he's more excited than Allison is.

One afternoon after we picked Allison up from school we went to Dick's Sporting Goods.  While we were exploring the baseball section, Nathan discovered an object and asked me, as he held it over his face "What this?" You can imagine my explanation that an athletic cup is not a face mask.  Needless to say, Allison was humiliated at my actions....how else was I suppose to explain it to someone who knows very little english.  Oh, where was Dad at this moment?

Friday, we had to take Nathan to the hospital for a sweat test to diagnose CF.  He was suppose to drink plenty of fluids that morning and since we would have about an hour drive on the interstate I thought I better be prepared.  I gave Nathan a bottle to use in the car in case he had to 'go'. Boys are kinda weird, because he was using it in the house instead of going to the bathroom....he was so proud to show it to me sitting on the KITCHEN COUNTER!!!!  Yuck!

Kevin and Nathan went to grab some dinner and while they were driving Kevin had Nathan call Aunt Betty. Nathan was trying to explain to Aunt Betty that his name is Nathan now, not Sasha. Aunt Betty could not understand him and he kept repeating himself.  Finally, Kevin said to Nathan, "She's deaf and She's old". So thinking that was what Papa wanted him to say, he says into the phone "SHE'S DEAF AND SHE'S OLD"  He had no idea what he was saying, he was just repeating Papa.  He's trying so hard to learn english and he's like a little parrot.  Better watch what you say:)

Last night as we were all snuggling in the bed, I said "oh we need to maleetza(pray)".  Nathan said "Mama, Papa No maleetza....Nathan maleetza".  He got up between us on his knees and held both of our hands and said in total english, "Dear God, Thank you for food, Mama, Allison, Nathan and Papa, Amen". Talk about a special moment.  God is so good and so real!!! Then I said, "Esus loves Nathan" and Nathan said, "Nathan loves Esus". (Esus, Jesus in Russian)

Now tell me whose life has changed the most.  We thought we were changing the life for an orphan, but little did we know how much he would change ours!!!

Over Stimulated

We had a beautiful day yesterday.  Played outside til dark.  Had a few visitors....Heather, Alana, Nevaeh and Pax came by and played a while. Mimi and Poppy and Uncle Greg stopped by with a few gifts.  Later a sweet family came over and brought us dinner and Nathan got to meet their two boys, Garrison and Edwin.  The boys played so well together and I am so excited for Nathan to make some friends so he won't miss the orphanage.

Nathan ended the day worn out and went to bed very early which made for an early rise this morning.

We went to church and it went pretty good, but definitely way too much stimulation!!! We made a poor decision to go grab a bite to eat and that's when the meltdown started.  He refused to eat, continuously kicked the seat until we interrupted the family's lunch behind us and had to remove him from the restaurant against his will....bad scene...pretty violent with me. Luckily he's only about 50 lbs and I out-weigh him quite a bit.  Made it home and again had to use force to bring him in the house.  All the time he's screaming Russian explicits at me. He eventually calmed down after I held him firmly but he is at the moment, by his own demands, no longer Nathan Alexsandr O'Shields..he is back to being Sasha Abramtsev and wants to go to the airport and back to the orphanage.  I have had to leave the room and let him sulk...I'm sure he will change his mind after he has had some time to think about it.

Needless to say, I am emotionally worn out.  I am not so naive to think this would not happen or won't happen again, but everytime it does it just ruins my nerves to the point of tears.  He is still worth it and I would never send him back.

I still need your prayers...probalby more now than before. Please pray that I will say and do all of the right things in regards to discipline.  Pray for me to make wise decisions as to not get to this point again...at least not too many more times:)

Okay, so now before I have even finished this blog he has come downstairs with tears in his eyes and has told me "No Sasha Russia, Nathan America Forever". Hopefully this episode will be a major milestone in the adjustment process!

With tears in his eyes and hoarsness in his voice he said "Mama, I love you very much"...hard to stay mad after that.  He even told Allison that he is sorry and he loves her too....so maybe we will go to "Valmart" afterall.  I think he is remorseful and doesn't want to go there again anytime soon....Lord, I pray!

Mama and Baby are doing well

They made it home!!  What a joyous occasion....all flights were on time and no lost luggage. 

Thank you to everyone for all of the sweet wishes and to the few that made it to the airport for the arrival. 

Everyone slept good...just not long enough....6:45am "Mama, Papa, Nathan hungry"

Busy morning already.   Breakfast, bath, bank, pharmacy, breathing treatment..........vacation is over!

A New Life Begins Today

It's 10:18 on Friday, February 19th, 2010. I'm looking around the house thinking, "Wow, this is all about to be different."

Kevin and Nathan Alexsandr arrive tonight at Hartsfield-Jackson Airport at 6:51pm.  I am so excited to see the expression on my new sons face when we make eye contact!  I hope he is going to be as excited as I am!

This has been an incredibly long 13 months for me.  I have cried, laughed, screamed and even questioned along the way. But every time I questioned, my God was quick to confirm that there is NO question....this child is my son. 

So as I sit here and type through the tears I know that regardless of what is next that God is already there with his hand out to me saying "Come on, it's going to be OK"....see I'm already here and I will hold your hand and your heart, don't be scared". But I am scared in my joy and happiness...I'm scared that my daughter will pull away from me becasue she thinks I don't love her, I'm scared that Nathan will be homesick and defiant, I'm scared that the health expenses will be more than we can handle, I'm scared Kevin's company will find a way to let him go because our insurance claims are costing them too much and on and on it goes.

But I am going to put ALL of that aside and soak in all of the memories that this day is going to make!  I am anxious for this to be the beginning of something great for our whole family.  I am letting this day mark the start of some new routines that we have been putting off as a family that I know are important and will help our new family of 4 bond together.

I will gladly accept any prayers that you want to offer as we move through the day and prepare for the homecoming of the new life that begins today.

8 more hours!!!!

02.13.10

I was sleeping in this morning and about 8 oclock the phone rang....."Hello Mama".  It was 4pm in Russia nd Kevin had already been to get Sasha from the orphanage FOR THE LAST TIME.....no more goodbyes!!  Praise the Lord.  Kevin said he was not able to take many pictures because Sasha had only one agenda and that was to get out of there.  He didn't hesitate, he didn't cry...he just wanted to go home to America! I'm sure we will deal with the realities later but I'm glad it wasn't sad for him today. 

So they are at the hotel in St Pete and will leave on Monday night to go to Moscow. In Moscow they will have some exit interviews and Sasha will have a physical (required by the US to bring him home). I hope that they get a chance to do some sight-seeing there....I'm sure it will be the last time they see Moscow:)

Pray for Kevin to have lots of patience as he tries to entertain an excited 10 year old for 6 days in a hotel room.  I'm sure they will be using the online translator alot. Luckily the hotel in Moscow has an indoor pool so that will occupy alot of Sasha's time and hopefully wear him out a little too. :)

On a different note, this final trip to Russia has been an eventful one.  God has continued to pour out his blessings.  Apparently, the Russian government deposits money into a trust fund for orphans for them to have when they turn 18.  Well Thursday morning Kevin got a call from the adoption facilitator.  Oksansa said that she thought they could go ahead and get Sasha's released to us now due to his medical needs. So on Friday Kevin, Oksana and Nina began their 10 hour trek around St Petersburg to try to locate the 4 different bank accounts that held the money for Sasha.  They were sucessful! What an incredible surprise and much needed blessing. We had no idea there was a trust fund to start with much less the chance that we would be able to withdraw the money now!!! I should make a list of all the blessings that we have received since beginning this journey, but the paper would not be long enough I'm sure.  

And to think, a little over a year ago all God wanted from me was 2 little words......"Yes, Lord."  Seems so simple looking back.

6 more days!!!

   

A few thoughts I don't want to forget...

My mind is shot!  This blog is more for me than for the friends that read it because I know one day (like tomorrow) I am not going to be able to remember certain things.  I guess I am just so distracted that I can't think.

So anyway, I am just going to be completely honest for a minute.  I have had some fearful moments over the last few days and weeks as the end draws near to bring Sasha home.  I know it is perfectly normal but I have just been praying and pleading with God to let everything work out with our new family.  If there has been something to worry about, then I have worried about it.  I have worried about how everyone's going to adjust, I've worried that Sasha would miss Russia and his friends, I have worried about the language barrier, I have worried about finances for tutoring and medical expenses, I have worried about how Sasha will do at the hospital and if he will be mad at me for making him go so soon....basically, you name it, I have probably worried about it at one point or another in the last few days.

So the other night I was taking a hot bath and re-reading this awesome book called "Forgotten God"...it's all about the Holy Spirit. Great, great book....you gotta get it! I had just finished the first chapter and was going to stop and pray and then finish reading in the bed.  So I laid there and just begged God to give me some confirmation that I am doing the right thing and that this wasn't just an emotional decision. I prayed that He would calm my fears and remind me that He's got it under control and He doesn't need my help.

I got out of the tub, came down stairs to get something to drink, went back up and laid down to read some more.  I opened the book to chapter 2 and you will not believe it....the next chapter was titled "What Are You Afraid Of?"(remember this book is about the Holy Spirit) It was so apparent that God was speaking to me that it was almost freaky.

You know, God should only have to tell us something once, but he knew in my case that reinforcment might be good:) So the next night he reconfirmed that adopting Sasha is his idea not mine. My brother Jeff came by to bring me a birthday present. He said he spent half the night in the book store looking for the perfect book for me....and after reading the back cover of "You were Born for This" he decided this was the one. Listen to this....it says "The truth is, you were born to live a supernatural life doing God's work by God's power. You were born to walk out your door each morning believing that God will use you to deliver a necessary miracle to someone in need...You were born for this!" I know some would just say Im' crazy or that's just coincidental...but I believe with all my heart that these are the exact things that I directly asked God for on Sunday night in the bathtub. CONFIRMATIONS that I am doing what God wants me to do in regards to adopting Sasha. His fingerprints are all over this journey!!!

I could stop there and that could be more than enough from God, but He continued throughout the week to bring reminders to me that I am where I am supposed to be.

I promise, two more examples and I'll stop......So while I was reading the new book that Jeff gave me I remembered two prayers that I have prayed over the past few years and this book triggered those memories which once again confirmed things to me. 1) I use to pray that God would do something so amazing in my life that it could ONLY be explained as a God thing. That my life would be a living testimony without words. 2) There was a popular book a few years ago called "The Prayer of Jabez" and in the prayer I asked God to expand my territory of influence for Him.  God has expanded my territory beyond anything I could have ever imagined. Russia??? I did not choose Russia or adoption (ask anybody that knew me a little over a year ago). NO! God sent this precious child from Zelenogorsk, Russia to Loganville, Georgia to pick ME to be his mother. This experience has stretched me far more than I could have ever dreamed. Yet God has been faithful every step of the way and has gone before us and prepared the way and shame on me for doubting.

So to wrap this all up, I just want to say I really do believe I am doing God's will for my life but the enemy can't stand it and so he has to keep me second guessing at every turn. 

I guess my request to you is that you would just pray for us....all of us, Kevin Allison, Sasha and me. Pray that we will be reminded daily that this is God's calling on EACH of our lives and that God's peace and provision will reign in our lives.....and that I will just QUIT worrying:)

Love everybody!!!

~Angie 

Second Trip to Russia

Monday January 18th I received an email that our court date had been set for January 28th, 2010. YAY!!!!!  So we franticly started our travel arrangements and sent off for our Visas.  We took off on the 25th towards our destination......St Petersburg, Russia. 

Travel was not as smooth as our first trip.  Because of the short travel notice we had to take what flights were available.  We left Atlanta, flew to Chicago and then on to Munich.  Upon arrival in Munich we had to circle for a while until we could land due to snowy weather.  Almost certain we would miss our connecting flight, we ran off the plane and on to the flight board to find our next gate.....no such luck, flight was CANCELLED:(  After standing in a line for about an hour to see what could be done, we were rebooked on another airline to fly to Moscow and then another flight to St Pete. After a lengthy walk to another terminal, we boarded our next flight.  Once on this plane we sat at the gate for about an hour waiting to take off which guaranteed we would miss our last flight to St Pete. By this time I'm losing my religion!  Not sure what time it is in Atlanta at this time but pretty sure I had been awake for well over 24 hours.  On top of that, I realize my mom is getting worried about why I have not called yet.  We had a world phone, but due to operator error we could not make the calls go through.  By the time we arrived in Moscow, after nearly 30 hours of traveling, no phone service to call home to a worrying family, noone who speaks English, a missed flight and -11 degrees...I was a wreck!  We finally got our flight rescheduled and were on a shuttle bus to a different terminal and I had had it!!!  I finally just said in a rather loud voice across the bus, "Does ANYBODY speak English" and praise the Lord a kind man from Norway said "What do you need?"  Awww, English....music to my ears.  He explained why we were not able to make phone calls on our phone and so then I dialed my parents.....Well, being the daddy's girl that I am, as soon as I heard his voice I started crying. Daddy's know just what to say to their little girls (usually)...He said "what is wrong with you? You are stronger than this and you need to suck it up".  haha...well, I did:)

We finally arrived in St Petersburg 7 hours late. Sergei picked us up, dropped us off at our Hotel and I popped a benedryl and enjoyed 8 glorious hours of sleep. 

The next morning we headed to the orphanage to see Sasha.  On the way to the orphanage we were surprised with a great treat.  Nina asked if we would like to bring Sasha back to our hotel to spend the night and ride with us to court the next day.....I was like DA DA DA!!!! That's Yes in Russian:)

Sasha was so excited to see us and since he knew we were coming, he had a little suit and tie on for the occasion.....what a cutie pie!

I'm not sure who was more excited about him coming with us to the hotel.  It was great day and God knew I needed some good news after the day before.

Poor little Sasha couldn't wait to get to the room.  The first thing he wanted to do was take a nice hot bath. (he only gets one a week at the orphanage).  After that we went down to the hotel restaurant and had dinner.  He was an eating machine!!

So we had a sweet time with our boy and a restless night of sleep for all because of all the excitement.

Thursday morning we headed off for our court hearing....nervous, hungry(too nervous to eat), tired and hoping for the best. 

Court was good....not anything like you would expect of a courthouse or courtroom. In fact, we were the last case to be heard in that particular location because the building is in such bad shape they are afraid it may collapse soon...I'm glad they didn't tell us that before court:)

After all was said and done we were granted permission to adopt and told we could take custody on Feb. 9th, 2010.

Despite the 7 flights and 49 hours of flying and only 2 days actually in St Pete it all became worth while in that very moment that I heard I get to be Sasha's mama.  

Kevin will leave on Monday the 8th to return to bring our boy home.  The trip will be long due to acquiring passports and exit interviews at the US Embassy in Moscow. We decided for just one of us to go back due to the expense of traveling.

Looking forward to an incredible reunion on Friday night, the 19th!